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I am a dedicated structural design engineer, aged 36. I spent my childhood playing with lego and building structures, which is ultimately what led to me deciding to pursue it as a career. I am interested in reading, computers, software usage, Internet browsing, blogging, traveling, as well as meeting and interacting with people both in person and over the internet.
Girls Beat Boys at School and Lose to Them at Work
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johann-brandt followed this discussion
My previous boss preferred men than women to lead his projects not because men are superior than women but because women have more responsibilities outside their work that can affect their performance as leaders. He always put into consideration that a woman can get pregnant anytime during the project and that somehow will affect her performance and women tend to be emotional than men when making tough decisions. I believe that both women and men are equal but some nature of work requires a man than woman and vice versa.
Why do you think most of the times men lead at work?
eliana-velez followed this discussion
I agree with everything in this article, but I feel like there's another dimension or two that weighs us down on top of all of this. Even further compounding issues. Boys are taught to be leaders, to exert dominance, to take what they want, to win. Women are not. And if we do become competitive, it's often against EACH OTHER! That's a whole other conversation.
Studies show over and over that men ask for raises differently, say no to assignments differently, supervise differently. And when women are as assertive, of course, that's viewed as unfavorable. And let's not forget that many women also have second full time jobs... Motherhood (or even just running a household with no kids). Even in the most"woke" households, women do more than their share of the work and bring this ridiculous need for perfection home too.
“Underqualified and underprepared men don’t think twice about leaning in” because they are rewarded for that behavior. Women who act in the same way are punished, so out of self-preservation, we learn to"hold back".
Reply to lyn.short
“Underqualified and underprepared men don’t think twice about leaning in” because they are rewarded for that behavior. Women who act in the same way are punished, so out of self-preservation, we learn to"hold back".
I don’t know that I agree. I think perhaps we’re socialized to think working hard is all that matters when other skills are equally or more important, like an ability to schmooze and network.
I think part of it is just the difference between men and women and how they approach things. It’s not just the office. Men are more likely to just go for things whether they think they can do it or not. Women are more likely to be more prepared and cautious. (This is a generalization, not true across the board.)
I think part of it is just the difference between men and women and how they approach things. It’s not just the office. Men are more likely to just go for things whether they think they can do it or not. Women are more likely to be more prepared and cautious. (This is a generalization, not true across the board.)
As any minority... if you go for something and then mess it up, you know that it is likely that your mess up is going to be pegged on your gender, race, etc. It's stereotype threat and it holds people back from reaching their full potential.
Reply to lyn.short
“Underqualified and underprepared men don’t think twice about leaning in” because they are rewarded for that behavior. Women who act in the same way are punished, so out of self-preservation, we learn to"hold back".
Agree. There are structural attitudes that also punish women who"lean in". Let's not, as a first reaction, blame women because that is the typical response to structural inequalities. And if you're a minority woman. Good luck. You can be punished by other women.
Women are assumed incompetent until proven otherwise, so we spend our lives trying to be perfect and outperforming our male and female peers to be heard and respected. When you exit the world of grades and enter the workforce, women continue to work twice as hard just to get half the recognition. It's not confidence, it's the acknowledgment (or lack thereof) of our competence.
Women are assumed incompetent until proven otherwise, so we spend our lives trying to be perfect and outperforming our male and female peers to be heard and respected. When you exit the world of grades and enter the workforce, women continue to work twice as hard just to get half the recognition. It's not confidence, it's the acknowledgment (or lack thereof) of our competence.
Yes! Totally agree with this.
Women are assumed incompetent until proven otherwise, so we spend our lives trying to be perfect and outperforming our male and female peers to be heard and respected. When you exit the world of grades and enter the workforce, women continue to work twice as hard just to get half the recognition. It's not confidence, it's the acknowledgment (or lack thereof) of our competence.
You're perfect! Your problems are entirely the fault of other people!
You're perfect! Your problems are entirely the fault of other people!
Oh, pay a little attention to reality and get a clue. You don't even know how much people have bent over backwards to favor you.
I worked outside the U.S. as a teacher long ago, and noticed how much boys were allowed to get away with (sloppy homework, even cheating), and how unfair it was to the many girls who worked much harder than they did (yes, not all boys). Eventually, I figured out that this was a feature, not a bug: the boys were being groomed, raised with a sense of entitlement that would actually get them farther in life. Assuming confidence without solid grounds is more durable than thinking you have to actually earn it. I have been thinking about that a lot as I look at American politics in the last year or two.
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I worked outside the U.S. as a teacher long ago, and noticed how much boys were allowed to get away with (sloppy homework, even cheating), and how unfair it was to the many girls who worked much harder than they did (yes, not all boys). Eventually, I figured out that this was a feature, not a bug: the boys were being groomed, raised with a sense of entitlement that would actually get them farther in life. Assuming confidence without solid grounds is more durable than thinking you have to actually earn it. I have been thinking about that a lot as I look at American politics in the last year or two.
I cannot confirm that.
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